Why Don’t My DNA Matches Respond To My Email ?

We’ve taken our DNA test, we’re jazzed with the results, and awaay go the emails to make a first contact.
As the days go by, we do not receive a response, and so often I am asked, “Why don’t my DNA matches respond to my email?”
Not everyone who performs a DNA test wants to meet other people. They wanted to know if they were Irish, British, French, Native American, etc. You generally won’t hear from them.
They may be family, but beyond sharing some treasured photos and a few family stories, they have their family. Though they wish you well, you’re not invited down their path.
“But this is a step-sibling in an adoption case I’m trying to solve!”
The two reasons above would also apply in this situation, but when we are looking for biological family that is absent due to adoption, we are walking on sensitive ground. Unless you are trying to contact the biological mother, the rest of the family may have never known about the incident. Not only that, they may not want to know.
I have had clients state, “I don’t want to know if you discover my grandmother had a child before they were married! Don’t even tell me!”
Many of us love the series, “Long Lost Family”, but there’s another side to the television program. They rarely, if ever, develop and show the episode whereby the answer was, “I don’t want to meet them, and I don’t want to know them. I’m not talking to you.” It’s not good for ratings.
The same is true in real life, whether the family is created biologically, or through an adoption situation.
Recently, after 25+ years of research, we were able to piece together and discover a great-grandparent’s sibling we’d hear about since childhood. To say we were overjoyed to find their descendants is an understatement! We shared an email or two, several photos, and the connection was over. Their family member wanted no more than a bit of information, while we had been trying to bring the lines back together again. This is life.
Therefore, enjoy the contacts you receive for the duration of time allowed. Realize that you have added to your family story with the photos and stories you share, and understand that it’s probably not a long term relationship.

1 Response to "Why Don’t My DNA Matches Respond To My Email ?"

  1. This was really an interesting topic and I kinda agree with what you have mentioned here! DNA test fitness

    ReplyDelete

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